Self musings

Every change brings along a feeling,that's novel - fear, apprehensions, hope, anxiety, excitement, happiness.

Sometimes the change is too abrupt, not giving any scope for preparation. Sometimes the change is slow and gradual and sometimes it is too subtle to be realized. There's a strange thing about changes, they change a lot of things. As funny as it sounds and as true as it gets. 

Every time the path ahead seems bleak,one needs to consider going ahead. Sometimes there seems to be nothing to move you ahead, and with an already ambiguous journey so far, one starts weighing each step ahead. Many times I think there's a child's heart still beating somewhere deep down there, which enables me to love easily and give in easily too. Life is about facing the ugly truths all the time, living with a past, parts of which one would like erasing out completely. With innumerable efforts relations are built and memories created and within seconds a void created to last a lifetime. 

There's so much that has changed around me, and , about me and yet a lot is still the same. Initially it was quite a task to recognize what is me from the fragments scattered all around. Now I've realized each fragment has me within. Change takes place, changing the course of life as it must happen, leaving one with a realization. It almost seems like a story book, chapter after chapter, one after another, twists and turns, climax and conclusion....

Voids don't only exist when you lose a person, they also exist when you lose a relation forever. When things can never stay the same any more, when memories cannot be summoned at or erased out at one's will, when you reach a point of numbness  and indifference in the conscious stage and yet your dreams seem to know your heart better, it is then, you know a void exists. 

....and yet, nothing is like a story book. Story books have predictable stories and hopefulness or hopelessness , having happy endings or sad endings but life, is never predictable. It is a long, long journey, to an unknown destination, the destination always changing with time, as the path keeps changing too. Yet, I believe in fairy tales, that convinvce me to believe in love, goodness, hope, and faith. Somehow, strangely enough, life eventually comes down to the most simplistic path, after a long arduous journey full of complications.